As a child, I was always fascinated by Winnie the Pooh, but Eeyore’s constant state of depression confused me. Why was he always so sad? Like most children, I didn’t find out until much later that the cause of Eeyore’s sadness was his lost tail. The one he had was not his own, and not having his tail affected him to the point he suffered some form of PTSD. Don’t be Eeyore. You lost your tail can be your former spouse, your foreclosed home, your stock or anything you hold dear. Newsflash: it’s time to get over losing it, and there are ways.
I’m not going to tell you breakups are easy or losing your job isn’t a big deal. Breakups aren’t easy, and no one wants to be fired. Well, mostly. To deal with that hurt, you must confront it. Look it in the face, acknowledge it, but don’t let it overwhelm your vision of self. Ask your self, where did I go wrong? What could I have done better?
The old adage says everything happens for a reason. I believe that, but to a degree. There is a reason for everything that happens, but that doesn’t mean it’s always a good one. However, for good or bad, it happened. It is out of your control. Your old boss won’t call you up and say, ”I’ve heard you’re so sad, I want you to come back.” Your ex won’t say, ”Ending things with you have made me realize how much I need you.”
When dealing with an issue that has already transpired, don’t obsess. I said it’s fine to think about it, but you have to know when to stop. It’s usually the moment when you say, ”I’ll stop obsessing later.” Procrastination enables obsession. The longer you let your bad breakup corrode your emotional state, the harder it will be to fight off depression.
The best thing you can do after a great loss is make a great plan to move forward. I know you’re tired of hearing how planning magically makes your goals a reality. No, it doesn’t work that way, but planning gives you an advantage. You’ll have a general idea of what to do, even if it’s not fully fleshed out. Know what your next move is.
You also have to thank the Greater Being you believe in for that foreclosure, car repo or breakup. You say why? Because maybe the universe saved you some agony. What if the house had a carbon monoxide leak slowly killing your family, or the car had a bad brakes and an accident was imminent? All of that is farfetched, but the point is, you never know the hell losing something or someone can save you.
Eeyore lost his tail and let depresssion consume him until he was a shell of a donkey. Sure, he’s a cartoon, yet he’s a an excellent example of how not getting over loss can drain your chances at happiness. Moping changes nothing. Action does. Forget your lost tail, whether it’s a spouse or prized possession. It isn’t the end of your life. It’s simply an alteration. You’re made to evolve, so just do it already.
*Jermaine Reed, MFA is a writer from Chicago who writes fiction, nonfiction, local news stories and national news stories. For self-publishers, authors and other writers and creatives, Jermaine provides proofreading on Fivver. Please join Jermaine’s email list to get notifications on new blog posts, writing advice and free books. Get my recently released Science Fiction novel A Glitch in Humanity by clicking here.